Okay, I hate nail art in general but this is fucking ridiculous. JUST FUCKING LOOK AT IT!

Those are seriously repulsive. And those are the more… decent [for lack of a better word] designs I dug up on Google.

Some are a bit… much.

Ya see?

*sigh* SMH.

These are the most hideous things ever and I don’t fucking care if you’re the most attractive girl in the world, I would NEVER let you fuck me with nails like those even if you get the best designs. I fucking swear, I feel an infection just from looking at it and I’m pretty sure I’ll get an actual infection if that thing comes within 20 feet of my vagina.

Who the fuck comes up with these things? Jesus H. Christ. Those nails should be banned. I shudder every time I look at it because I’m a hormonal teenage lesbian, I can’t help but think about how it’s going to feel it my hoohah. And God, that is just so fucking wrong. 

I… No more words. :| 

The words we speak may be lost in the wind; And the acts we portray, lost in time. But you will never be lost in my memories. 

Love, Me.

Don’t tell anyone but I actually cry over these lady loving couple videos on YouTube because I’m alone and so fucking jealous. In fact, I’m having a waterworks fest right now.

I have this kind of fixed notion about myself. And at one point, everything I believed about me was true. But everyday, people change. Mostly unknowingly. So I’m not really the person I thought I was. I realize that now.

I suck again. HAHAHA. Damn it.

I mean, it’s nice to let everything out once in a while especially when you’re alone. It makes every problem seem smaller. I don’t know why or how, it just does.

I used to avoid crying. I didn’t think it was okay to cry. I thought it was a sign of weakness. Bow I know that it’s perfectly healthy and normal to cry once in a while.

Then Taylor Swift’s “Songs About You” played where she sang this line:

I can’t wait for the day I stop pretending that I’m really okay when I’m not.

So, I thought, “Maybe I should tweet that.” I typed it in and everything but when I was about to press the Tweet button, I realized, “…I can’t actually relate to that.” So I didn’t tweet it.

I guess I was just so used to thinking that I had all these problems and it’s just now that I step backed and looked at the entirety of my current life and it’s pretty damn good. Plus I’m not the person who keeps to myself anymore. I’ve changed a lot in the past couple of years and it’s refreshing. I used to just keep schtum about everything and it was so exhausting. Now I act out my feelings and it’s really nice to be able to do so ‘cause it’s nobody’s business. I used to think about what others are going to say about my words and actions but now I realize I don’t really care all that much anymore. I’m still not on that Fuck-You-I-Don’t-Give-A-Flying-Fuck-What-You-Think stage but I’m pretty close. I do still care about their opinions somehow but it doesn’t bother me all that much anymore. Especially since I realized I’m gay and that everyone’s going to have something to say and I can’t change that.

I guess I just figured that I’m my own person, nobody can change that. I do what I want and be who I want to be. And nobody can change that. I don’t have to hide. I’m pretty damn proud of myself actually.

I mean, it’s not like she’s going to burn old ladies or eat babies on stage. Like, what the fuck? And how is not wearing pants on stage an issue? Other artists do it too and you don’t care.

Also, claiming that her lyrics are anti-Christian? Really? If they took the time to fucking understand them before they run their mouths then they won’t be advertising their idiocy, bigotry and close-mindedness to the fandom and the public in general. And they’re all fucking hypocrites for saying that. This concert actually promotes love and unity. Lady Gaga encourages people to love others. Right? They’re beautiful in their way ‘cause God makes no mistakes. Which is exactly what the Church should be promoting. And I resent that the opposite is happening. All the segregation is really saddening. People put other people in this category or that category. Like, “God says love everyone but that doesn’t count for gay people. Or people who have sinned. Or these people for these reasons. Or those people for other reasons.” ‘Cause really, everyone keeps talking about unconditional love but nothing’s happening ‘cause they don’t practice what they preach. I can’t express how I feel. It’s just really sad.

Back to the BTW Ball, let the rest of the Mons†ers have a chance to meet our idol. [I say them because sadly, I’m not going. :(] ‘Cause I honestly have no idea how you’re going to benefit the cancellation of the Born This Way Ball. It’s not going to suddenly bring world peace. Like how pushing through with it isn’t going to bring the apocalypse. What’s the worst thing that could happen? It’s not like every Filipino’s suddenly going to become Satanists or something. Or it’s not like the country’s going to burn down.

It’s just one person, being there for her fans. Being there to show them that no matter what people say, no matter what people do, if you know what’s right, you fight for it and be strong. Being there to show them to believe in themselves. Being there to show them love. And how love is always right.

PAWS UP MONS†ERS!

So, I know it’s probably going to be a long time before I meet you. And that’s okay. I’m am only 15. I still have a lot to figure out. I have senior year and college ahead of me. Also, I still have to live my life. Finishing school is just the beginning.

But yeah, I have to admit, sometimes I wonder what it’s going to be like to have you. My plans for the future don’t actually include a love life. ‘Cause I don’t know when we’re going to cross paths but I’m sure that whenever it happens you’re going to make me happy.

Love, Me.